Non-Zero November ’16 – Day 11 – Do you like you?

Disclaimer: Despite what this post discusses, I do enjoy makeup and clothes, so I’m not suddenly going to stop wearing makeup and walk around in my birthday suit. It’s far too cold for that.

There’s a song that came out a while ago now (June 9th 2014 to be precise) and I only really heard it properly earlier on this year. It’s a beautiful song that is easy to listen to and soothes the soul and pumps you up at the same time. Some songs are blatant with their meanings, and others are open to a bit of interpretation, and I’ll provide my interpretation of this one. The song in question is Try by Colbie Caillat.

Put your make up on
Get your nails done
Curl your hair
Run the extra mile
Keep it slim
So they like you. Do they like you?

While I myself have never really cared what others think of my physical self, I can understand where she is coming from and how others might feel. However, for me, this song is about how I perceive myself. I do have the above thoughts in my head and I constantly think I should be doing these things in order to like myself. I rush my makeup in the mornings as I wake up late. I haven’t painted my nails in over a week. I never curl my hair (or even style it really). I don’t exercise. I am slim, but that is due to a semi-healthy diet and natural metabolism. All of these make me think “I should put more effort in”. Do I like me?

Get your sexy on
Don’t be shy, girl
Take it off
This is what you want, to belong
So they like you. Do you like you?

I don’t feel like a sexy person, and I am shy about my body. I do want to feel like those I perceive as sexy in order to like myself. At this point in the song, I start to recoil a little and think about how I haven’t shaved my legs in a while, or that my underwear doesn’t match, or that my hair really needs a wash. I don’t put any effort in recently. Do I like me?

You don’t have to try so hard
You don’t have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don’t have to change a single thing

This bit makes me well up a bit, because I don’t have to try. I don’t have to give away my time, effort, and money for this. All I have to do in the morning is get up and walk out as I am.

Get your shopping on,
At the mall,
Max your credit cards
You don’t have to choose,
Buy it all
So they like you. Do they like you?

This bit doesn’t mean clothes to me. It means furniture and decoration for my home. I regularly think “I could buy that matching coffee table, side table and bookcase set with my savings and then I don’t have to think about it again”, as then I have those things I want and I can be happy with my home. I think this despite my trusty cheap table and bookshelves being perfectly fine. Do I like me?

Wait a second,
Why should you care, what they think of you
When you’re all alone, by yourself
Do you like you? Do you like you?

The makeup, clothes and furniture don’t like me; they nothing me. It doesn’t matter how people perceive my physical self – it’s my internal self that matters. I have all these insecurities about myself, despite not actually caring that much what other people think of me. I am an introvert and a pessimist. I am generous and kind. I am passionate and reserved. I have overcome situations in my life that may not be that big of a deal to others, but mean everything to me. I both love and hate my life. I am both happy and sad. I am crying while writing this. Do I like me?

Take your make up off
Let your hair down
Take a breath
Look into the mirror, at yourself
Don’t you like you?
Cause I like you

I took my makeup off.

I let my hair down.

I took a deep breath.

I looked into the mirror, at myself.

Do I like me?

I like me.

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Toodle-pip. ♥

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